My heart is guarded. A wall has been built.
The bridge has broken. The doors are short tight.
I have an army ready to attack.
Yeah, I want something meaningful, but my defense pushes people away.
I’m scared to let love in, because I am terrified that it will leave me again and leave me hurting.
I want to tear down my defenses but my mind kept reminding me the reason it was put up in the first place.
I want something beyond explanation, but sometimes when I find it, it rejects me. Whereas, making the wall thicker. The more the pain the thicker the wall, that is how the game works
I hope to find someone to take away the pain. I hope meeting them will smooth my soul. But for now all I have is me, the willingness for change and the ability to make a change and that is okay.